That's Gay

I rarely spout my political viewpoints in a public forum.  Healthy political debate seems to be dead and I’m not about to lose friends over trifling economic and social issues that don’t really stir me up all that much.  But, with the recent gay marriage ruling in New York and all the inevitable pot-stirring that is already started on both sides of the issue, I feel compelled to share a few rambling thoughts.

I won’t share my own personal viewpoint on gay marriage (although the tone of this message will make it pretty self evident).  I simply want to ask a very simple question to all the people who have spent so many years adamantly opposing its legalization…

Why do you care?

Is it because it’s against your religious beliefs?

Then make sure your church/temple/mosque/etc. makes a ban on gay marriage one of its cornerstones of worship – that’s your right in a freely religious society.  But why insist on mixing the laws of your church with the laws of your land?

Here’s the thing – religious marriage and civil marriage are not the same, no matter how much some people try to tell you they are.  I don’t want the government telling my pastor how to consecrate the covenant of holy matrimony and I don’t want my pastor telling me how to file my joint income tax return.

And besides, the argument that homosexuality is a deviant, Scripture-defying trait has a pretty weak application here.  We are, on a whole, an “immoral” society.  Many of our sinful behaviors are even allowed by the government.  We drink to excess.  We gamble.  We work on the Sabbath.  Even the most pious of us defy God’s will frequently.  From The 10 Commandments, to the Golden Rule, to all the ancient Jewish laws found in Leviticus (home of the famous “man shall not lie with man, as with woman” rule), none of us is without sin.  If our government legislated directly from the Bible (or the Torah.  Or the Quran), we’d all be in jail.

But the morality of homosexuality is beside the point anyway.  Even if gay marriage does break God’s law, what impact does it have on you if it’s approved by Man’s law?  Your path to Heaven is yours and yours alone.  If your gay neighbor decides to marry her partner, it doesn’t change your trajectory toward Salvation.

Is it because you fear it creates a “slippery slope” to legalizing other “unordinary” behaviors?

I’ve heard arguments that legalizing gay marriage opens the door to everything from legal child brides to people marrying their pets.  Not really.  A good chunk of our nation’s laws are designed to protect those who are unable to protect and/or think for themselves (children, for example).  Two able-minded, consenting same-sex adults who decide to get married need no such protection, at least no more than two able-minded consenting opposite sex adults do.

Others bring up polygamy, which is technically also marriage between consenting adults.  However, I view the illegality of polygamy to be more on the grounds of equal protection and administration (handling of Social Security benefits, etc.).  I don’t see how, legally, that would be the case with gay marriage, which mirrors heterosexual marriage in every way except gender.

Is it because you fear it will destroy the concept of the nuclear family?

We heteros have been doing a spectacular job of that already.  We are surrounded by dysfunction, some of it allowed by law – divorce, infidelity, domestic abuse, etc., etc.

My parents are Baby Boomers, a generation with a divorce rate hovering around 50%.  While I was lucky to grow up in a home that could have rivaled The Brady Bunch, many people I know did not, and some have the scars to show for it.  I fail to see how these negative trends could be any worse in homes with two dads or two moms.  And frankly, gay households are going to exist whether the couples are married or not.  Private adoption agencies and fertility clinics tend to be fairly non-discriminatory when it comes to sexual orientation.

I’d go further, but I don’t want to delve into any philosophical arguments for or against homosexuality.  I’m simply trying to point out that, amidst all the hysteria, the legalization of gay marriage is just as unlikely to turn the United States into a lawless wasteland as it is to send our entire citizenry to Hell.

Remember, at its core, democracy is designed to protect life, liberty and property.  Our American system follows this concept, albeit a bit more vaguely, replacing “property” with “the pursuit of happiness.”  It's a simple set of tenets behind which every part of our society is meant to be governed.

So I ask again ... why do you care?.  How does state-approved gay marriage legally infringe on any of these ideals for you?